Danny Gallagher

The fact that two of Hollywood’s darlings couldn’t make it work may not have been a surprise, but their ridiculously quick divorce turned so many heads that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes might be sued for whiplash.

Grilling outdoors might seem simple since it’s the way that sub-average intelligent cavemen cooked food for themselves for years, but they’re all dead now — probably because they didn’t know that undercooked meat can cause food poisoning.

In the old days, if you were lucky, you worked until you turned 55, joined the ranks of the retired and scarred your grandkids for life by telling them about all the ears you collected during the big war. Now, times are tough and pensions are nothing but a distant memory. So more people are working longer and retiring later, if they even retire at all. Of course, some really should consider takin

Science has done a lot of great things in our time. It’s brought mankind to the surface of the moon and back. It has given us a bountiful supply of food. It has created super-stretch waistbands on pants for people who are as big as the moon because they consume too much food.

Temperatures are reaching new heights as we move into the summer. Sweltering humidity have made being outdoors almost unbearable. The sun is laughing at us.

Everyone knows that times are tough, but some are tougher for others. Take, for instance, your local ice cream man who has become an American staple, especially during the hot summer months in suburban neighborhoods around the country. He’s miserable and he spends his day in a refrigerated van surrounded by tasty frozen treats!

Car thefts have been one of those crimes that seem to exist whether the economy is bad or good.

Social technology, like Facebook, might be a great way for people to keep in touch, but it can also just as easily become a massive hindrance.

The drug war is a giant mess. Don’t believe it? As the late comedian Bill Hicks once pointed out, “That would imply that there is a war and the people who are on drugs are winning it.”

A disturbing trend has started to become an even more disturbing trend. And for once, we’re not talking about the Kardashians, so you can put away the weapons.